| Chapter 1: | Operationalizing Fidelity |
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notions of marriage and dual exclusivity. For the participants in this study, fidelity is the ultimate catalyst for feeling special and making one’s partner(s) feel significant. In other words, fidelity (rather than marriage, monogamy, or even exclusivity) may be the defining feature of contemporary romantic relationships.
Situating Fidelity within Contemporary Romantic Relationships
Most previous research on fidelity assesses people’s behavior and attitudes within marital and heteronormative frameworks, which reinforce cultural ideals of monogamy. This is somewhat understandable, given the history of monogamy, heterosexuality, and marriage in America. Over the past two hundred years, marriage has shifted from an economic construct and a religious necessity to a relational, affective experience. Still, cultural norms, institutions, and social expectations perpetuate the romantic marital union as the epitome of relationship design (Swidler 2001; Previti and Amato 2003; Green 2006). The rules of sexual and emotional fidelity are both implicit and explicit in marriage and ensure the highest level of relational commitment. Although a new dialogue of intimacy in marriage has developed (Mazur 1973; Giddens 1992; Fletcher 2002; Struening 2002; Shumway 2003), there remains significant emphasis on monogamy and dual fidelity (Treas and Giesen 2000; Cherlin 2002).1
A variety of evidence supports the claim that whereas relationship structures and styles have in fact diversified in the wake of social and political changes, the master template remains intact. Even cohabitators (Brown 2005) and gays and lesbians (Lever 1994) are allegedly able to reap the rewards that heterosexual marriage promotes. A reframing of the gay and lesbian movement to further same-sex marriage rights is a clear indication that though sexual diversity is a characteristic of a changing culture, there remains a continued emphasis on the master