| Chapter 1: | Operationalizing Fidelity |
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jealousy, though, because women and men are socialized differently in regard to love and sex.
Jealousy can occur in both monogamous and nonmonogamous relationships (Dijkstra et al. 2001). Because sexual fidelity is a rule usually expected in monogamy, the threat of extradyadic sexual relations becomes a main cause of romantic jealousy (Buunk 1982; Hendrick 2004). However, if sexual fidelity is not expected in nonmonogamy, then what are the sources of jealousy for nonmonogamists? Jealousy can occur over any type of sexual or nonsexual activity or behavior, emotional connection, or even the potential for love to develop with someone else. Some nonmonogamists actively resist jealousy as a mononormative construct that denotes ownership and proprietary rights of one individual over another. Others assume that jealousy is an obvious component of balancing multiple partners and therefore establish and negotiate their rules in order to minimize it.
Commitment, which also implies sexual fidelity, is subjective and varies by definition and use (Kanter 1968; Ramey 1975; Quinn 1982). Rosenblatt (1977) defined commitment as a person’s declared intention to stay in a relationship. Ramey (1975) used commitment to refer to a relationship involving dialogue, trust, and responsibility. Quinn (1982) found that American interviewees used the term commitment in the sense of promise, dedication, and attachment. Based on interviews with eleven married couples, Quinn analyzed how each individual used the term commitment, suggesting that most used the word in the context of marriage and sexual fidelity.
There is a growing body of research on how nonmonogamists regard and experience commitment (Blumstein and Schwartz 1983; Munson and Stelboum 1999; Finn and Malson 2008). Some nonmonogamists see commitment as the level of love or dedication they have to their primary partner or to the success of the relationship (Ramey 1975). Establishing rules, therefore, that ensure commitment to the primary partner or the primary relationship are a part of nonmonogamy. Rules that govern