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Preface
Too often, I have seen that as human beings we confuse our values with our skills. It seems we think that because we value being loving, ethical, and kind that we think we are good at being so. Sadly, this is too often not the case. How often do we see the best of intentions collapse into contentions along with associated disappointments, frustrations, and acrimony? Such collapses are too frequent in our personal relationships, our homes, and our work-places.
I have, therefore, long argued if we value being loving, ethical, and kind, it might be best not to assume we are good at being so, but rather, to set about the task of developing the relational skills needed to express these values. Such skills are often called soft-skills.
It has long been my view that many relational collapses are the result of ineptitude rather than ill will. That is, they are the result of a lack of skills rather than a lack of goodwill. To put it in the way that will be addressed in this book, many of our relational problems may be competency related. This might be good news. Competencies can be learned.